Polyvagal Theory for Caregivers: Calming Stress & Finding Connection with Teresa Quadres, LCSW

In this episode, I sit down with Teresa Quadres, LCSW to explore Polyvagal Theory and how it applies to the caregiving journey. Teresa explains how our autonomic nervous system responds to stress through the “ladder” of three states—ventral vagal, sympathetic, and dorsal vagal—and how recognizing and befriending these states can help both caregivers and their loved ones. Together, we unpack practical ways to notice, normalize, and regulate our nervous system responses while caregiving.

👤 Meet Teresa Quadres:

Teresa Quadres is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker with 25 years of experience in healthcare, primarily in palliative care and hospice. She currently balances her work as a palliative care social worker with her private psychotherapy practice, where she supports caregivers and individuals navigating stress, grief, and life transitions.

📌 Topics Discussed:

• What Polyvagal Theory is and why it matters for caregivers
• The “ladder” analogy: ventral vagal, sympathetic, and dorsal vagal states
• How trauma and stress shape nervous system responses
• Co-regulation between caregivers and their loved ones
• Reframing guilt and why caregiver self-care isn’t selfish
• Practical tools to recognize and shift your state

⏱️ Timestamps (Approximate):

00:00 – Welcome and re-introduction to Teresa

06:00 – What is Polyvagal Theory?

12:45 – The three nervous system states explained

21:10 – How caregivers get “stuck” in stress responses

30:00 – Co-regulation and supporting your loved one

40:00 – Tools for noticing and befriending your nervous system

53:00 – Anchors, glimmers, and practical tips for daily caregiving

💡 Key Takeaways:

• Your nervous system is constantly scanning for cues of safety or danger—even outside your awareness.
• Caregivers can learn to recognize where they are “on the ladder” and use awareness as the first step toward regulation.
• Co-regulation is real: calming yourself helps calm your loved one.
• Self-care is not selfish—it directly impacts your loved one’s wellbeing.
• Tools like glimmers, anchors, and mindful awareness can help reframe stress and bring more balance.

📚 Resources Mentioned:

Teresa Quadres’ website: TeresaQuadres.com

Teresa’s blog (on Polyvagal Theory and caregiving)

Deb Dana – Rhythm of Regulation

Book: Anchored by Deb Dana

Book: Why Zebras Don’t Get Ulcers by Robert Sapolsky

🤝 Connect with Teresa Quadres

🌐 Website: TeresaQuadres.com

Connect with Laura Vaillancourt & the Life on Repeat Podcast:

🌐 Website: lifeonrepeatpodcast.com

📱 Instagram: @lifeonrepeat.podcast

📘 Facebook: facebook.com/Lifeonrepeatpodcast

📧 Email: hello@lifeonrepeatpodcast.com

Thank you for tuning in to this rewind episode! 💜 Don’t forget to like, subscribe, and share with someone who may need encouragement today. Every caregiver deserves tools, support, and a little hope on the journey.